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10.01.2008 -
Happy new year
to all of you! I think it's going to be an interesting year on many
levels. Unfortunately I won't be able to get it going as soon as I
would have liked because on December 21st I injured my finger (ring
finger on the left hand) playing football with Harley. It was one of
those really silly accidents. I caught the ball in the wrong way and
then boom. Excruciating pain. The joint was swollen and I couldn't
move it. Naturally, I was quite worried and in minor shock. I went to
casualty where they did an x-ray which didn't show any real break or
dislocation apart from a possible chipped bone at the base of the
finger. The injury is common with basketball players (Go Milwaukee
Bucks!). What they did know is I had torn a ligament or two and
suggested I see a hand specialist. The next day I couldn't move the
finger at all. I tried calling every hand specialist in the region and
of course they were all on a break. It's only last week that I finally
managed to see someone.
He knew right away what the problem was. I don't know if it was by
looking at the hand or my eyes. Right away he said: "Two torn
ligaments... nine to twelve weeks or more to heal properly". He also
told me I should keep moving it and to remove the splint which
apparently wasn't helping. I then told him how important it was for me
because I am a musician and stressed how I really need my fingers
working. He gave me an incredulous look and said: "Your profession
isn't the only one that relies on the fingers". Ouch I thought. He
gave me a prescription of some cream to massage into the finger,
wished me luck and sent me on my way (to pay the bill which was very
expensive for a five minute session).
It was a psychological boost knowing it would eventually heal, but
more importantly, what I walked away with was a valuable lesson which
I am still trying to process. It has something to do with bringing
oneself down to size. Our egos can sometimes get the better of us to
the point we think everything we do is 'meaningful'. Many people in
the arts suffer from this delusion. This might also be why we have
little accidents which, if read in a certain way, could be signs. So I
can't play the guitar right now (this explains why I have the time to
write a newsletter... sorry for the delay). I suppose having a finger
not working could be like being a writer and not being able to use the
letter E. I have spent the last couple of weeks wondering what on
earth is it I can or could do other than be a musician. I kind of
fancy the idea of being a multimillionaire investment banker, property
tycoon, steel magnate, formula one racing driver, or anything that
makes me super rich and powerful. Or I could be a plumber, waiter,
gardener, street cleaner (come to think of it, the last plumber we had
arrived in a new Merc). The point is, everyone is important and
everyone is unimportant.
I saw a fantastic TV show this Christmas. "The Extras Christmas
Special", starring Ricky Gervais who created "The Office". Extras is a
story about exactly that; an actor who only gets extras parts. Finally
he gets what he's always dreamed of where he is in a position to write
and star in his own sitcom. But unfortunately he isn't happy with the
show nor the producers. He has the highest ratings on TV but the
series sucks and he knows it. He becomes rich and famous, wins awards,
but is not respected by his peers. His career then takes a nosedive
and his dodgy agent gets him all that is available which is being a
contestant on "Celebrity Big Brother". This is when he said something
that spoke loudly and clearly to me. He looked at the banality of his
situation and questioned how actors, musicians, writers, celebrities
etc often say their craft is "in the blood" and they couldn't do
anything else. He then went on to say that that is because they don't
want to or refuse to get a normal job. Yes, I feel fortunate to have a
talent which has allowed me to forge a career for so long but part of
me has always thought I have been getting away with something.
Reality. Music has made me happy but it's not the be all and end all.
I feel there is something else out there more meaningful. Like real
work maybe.
I am rambling again. What all this has to do with my career I don't
know. Someone wrote to me after a recent newsletter saying "Are you
trying to be humble or something" when referring to the Mike Stern
look-alike incident. Bollocks I say. After my death I will be donating
my ego to science. Not my kidneys. No, I am not humble, neither am I
weak-willed. I am going through some kind of crisis at the moment
because I am seriously questioning the validity of what I do as a
musician. I suffer from bipolar egoitis. I think I am great one day
and lame another. Having this finger ailment is giving me time to
think about what the !@#$ it is I should be doing with my life. But am
I happy? Absolutely, because I am a member of the best family in the
world who I can love and be loved by. This is the right place for me
to be. It beats being in a band (not by much though).
Back to reality: While I contemplate the importance of my place in the
universe I will eventually have to get back on the bike and pay some
bills (six kids, a wife, an ex, and some rather impressive overheads).
There are plans in place which I will follow, God willing. I plan to
do more shows, writing and recording with Sarah Jane Morris, more
writing and recording with my favourite singer/lyricist William Topley,
I will be working with the Portuguese artist Mariza, the
German/Israeli artist Avital, the trumpeter Otto Sauter, my favourite
pianist in the world Yaron Herman, and the greatest drummer in the
world Manu Katche, I will be writing and recording an album with Peter
Kater, and getting involved in many other studio projects. I will be
doing some more recording with my band and there are shows planned.
Details of all this stuff will be posted on the website soon.
That puts the housework out of the way. And now, back to fantasy land.
Or maybe not. I don't have any funny stories with this newsletter.
Maybe next time. I am thinking of you all and will keep you posted on
all my movements as they transpire should you be at all interested. I
feel very fortunate to have such a loyal fan base and really
appreciate all the support I get from you. You are the best. By the
way, thank you to the MiFe boys and girls who set up a trust fund in
my name for children's hospitals. In 1997 my niece Naomi died aged
nine of carcinoma cancer at the Great Ormond Street Hospital in
London. A great place. (The song "Rest In Peace" from the "Second
Nature" album is dedicated to her). Your generosity means everything
to me and shows how lucky I am to be associated with you.
Love,
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